A List of Things I Simply Cannot Do

1. Follow any sort of directions where pictures replace words. This includes origami, sewing patterns, directions for assembly, etc.


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2. Throw a repeatable football spiral.

3. Play any form of instrument.

4. Whistle on key (or so I’m told).

5. Tolerate any grotesque display of bodily contortions.

6. Have my blood taken without getting woozy.

7. Tolerate any sort of prolonged fidgetiness or unnecessary repetitiveness.
(It might be obvious at this point that my tolerance level is a little low.)

8. Throw caution to the winds.

And my husband has suggested I add…

9. Lose an argument. I like that he can recognize that.

What talents do you wish you had?

Posted in shortcomings on 04/14/2010 10:01 pm
 

5 Comments

  1. Texas Writer

    I sometimes wish I could read an interesting blog and NOT leave a comment. Folks must get so tired of me. Love the little Yoda, BTW. Now I want to poke around your blog some more and look for your books. I just got Kindle for my Mac.

  2. I can't whistle. At all. So you're ahead of me there.

    Other things? Parallel parking. Speak with any accent other than that of Michigan. Or write dialogue in any sort of regional dialect, for that matter. I cannot cut straight, and it drives me crazy. I always cut wrapping paper (and my bangs!) completely crooked!

    Can you tell I liked your post a lot? :)

  3. What an illuminating list.

    Of course your response to hubby should be "what would you know?"

    Al

    Publish or Perish

  4. Green Girl in Wisconsin

    Origami confuses the heck out of me, too. I can't do much with paper, other than write on it and wrap presents, come to think of it. I can't balance a checkbook, apply make up or nail polish without it looking like a 5 year old did it. I can't walk on my hands, look down from great heights without feeling queasy or sing on key.
    I love your post topic today!

  5. I'm opposite of you when it comes to pictures and words. A paragraph of sewing directions will kill me. I need a picture for reassurance.

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